Self-Love

Happy New Month, Everyone!!! Yesterday marked two months since we got married and we’re so hyped and excited about this journey together! God has been completely faithful and has been blowing our minds on a daily basis beyond our wildest imaginations. It is a reminder that as you seek Him first in every affair of your life, all other things will be added unto you, Matthew 6:33. [Praise break…🕺🏾🕺🏾🕺🏾]

Previously on Faith|Hope|Love

Sometime in July, we asked for topic contributions we could blog on through our IG page (@barryandrabby). We got a tall list of over 40 topics. Thank you so much for sharing topics you would want us to discuss. Today we will be tackling one of suggested topics:

“Feeling unworthy of dating a person because you think the person is too good for you”

So Rabby and I will be sharing on this today. My contributions will be in blue, and Rabby’s contributions will be in italics. 

First of all, I can really relate to that situation; i.e feeling unworthy of dating a person because you think the person is too good for you. In my case, I kept wondering why Barry chose me – because in my opinion I wasn’t a “catch” compared to him. I felt we were mismatched and I wouldn’t stop telling him about this, with relevant examples😆. Whenever she talked that way, I would get very upset – I wasn’t interested in being with someone who didn’t see any value in herself. On the other hand, I was dumped in High School because (in the words of my ex,) I was “too good to be true”. I didn’t know what she meant by that until recently. In my situation, “being too good to be true” meant that everything was perfect or acceptable. I never took offence or had any issues with her even when she did something wrong. I wouldn’t have thought that was being “too good to be true”, but this shows how inaccurately we may read people. The truth is, no one is too good – only God is good. Everyone has been made wonderfully complex with a bonus of flaws.

The principle here is working on being the best version of yourself for the benefit of others, (in the case of a relationship, for your partner). Thinking someone else is too good for you implies that you don’t see any value in yourself. Let me just share that having such a mindset is unhealthy – it is a sure sign that there are some insecurities in your life that you need to be healed of – and only Jesus can heal. This was something I had to learn on my own – though Barry would scold me and say, “Work on it!” It was I who did the actual work. Over time, I learnt more about the matchless love of God. I learnt that whether or not I thought I was worthy of being loved, God loves me. He created me for himself and for His glory – I am simply priceless! 

The only reason why I would think that I was not good enough to build a friendship with someone was that I did not believe and had not accepted what God says about me in His word. The Bible says that God will not withhold anything good from us. Psalm 84:11 – so even if your friend is “too good”, the more reason why they may be for you- lol! God has placed so much in each of us, it is almost an insult to Him for us to feel ‘unworthy’ of other good things He may have in store for us.

Finally, as a young man or young woman, you have grown through at least fifteen (15) years of struggles, lessons, friendships, etc. You have managed to gain insight and understanding that you didn’t have many years ago. By that, you have added value to yourself. Whether or not your potential life partner seems to have it all-together, they will still benefit from the value you have to offer. A relationship is a friendship – a partnership that should benefit both parties involved. If I never understood who I was, and accepted God’s love, I may not have seen how good I was for Barry. In actual sense, the closer you get to God, the more you identify and appreciate your true nature. It gives you a sense of direction and conviction that you are destined for something greater that you can imagine. In appreciating your self-value, it leads to allowing someone else to appreciate and take care of you all the same. Mind you, Rabby can share lessons of where she was and how she got out of it, but if you are one who is struggling with this mindset, we want to admonish you to run to Jesus and allow Him to heal your heart and mind. 

That’ll be all for this month!! Thank you and have a blessed month! Feel free to drop some topics you would like to discuss / share ideas on! Enjoy the weekend!

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