As promised in the previous blog post, here’s a story I have kept till the right time to share…
A week after I graduated from university, the man I love promised to marry me.
I didn’t think it would happen anytime soon, but it was comforting to know that we both wanted it to happen.
It was exciting and a thought filled with so much hope, I sometimes mistook our faith for hot air. So, I got the opportunity to flaunt a promise ring around and keep the concept of getting married in my prayers.
Amidst the dreams I had, and fears I nurtured, my primary concern was not how I felt inadequate or unworthy, but whether our parents were ready for this step. Alan and I have been the “babies” in our families for so long, that I was certain that we would definitely have to tackle serious opposition before we’re all on the same page.
For us, marriage is a big step that should involve God and both families. By this, we desired to have everyone’s blessings before we work on the technicalities of the institution, preparations, etc.
So, in June 2016, we started praying about the journey to marriage. Both random and close friends prompted us about dreams they have had about our relationship and marriage, as well as messages they had that said ‘You will marry early’. Personally, I was just wondering how God intended to make that happen.
Exactly a year from when he gave me a promise ring, Alan was ‘adulting’ – he met with his parents as well as mine and declared his intentions.
Guys, after we spoke to them, they gave us 100% support!!! Of course, a number of questions were asked, and though they didn’t have prior knowledge about our intentions, they were on top of it sooner than I could say supercalifrajilisticespialidocious!
On 3rd October 2017 there was a knocking ceremony at my house – that’s when in the Ghanaian culture the man’s family visits the woman’s family, communicating their intentions to ask for her hand in marriage.
It was like a dream.
Soon after the knocking, my family was out of the country for a family trip. (If you haven’t read that post, you can catch up here).
The day after we landed, Alan went on one knee!
Here’s how that happened: I told him I didn’t want a proposal, because – duh – the ‘yes’ goes without saying (I mean, we were all in-the-know, with speaking to parents, etc). Eventually, I changed my mind(as is normal with me). Yet, he still managed to spring it up on me! He came over and we were playing a treasure hunt – (we do fun games once in a while). The clues (about five of them) led me to where he had hidden the ring box.
He was so sweet to keep it as minimal as I wanted it to be – I couldn’t trust myself to be on a socially-acceptable level of excited; I would’ve gone through the roof if other people were around! As he went on his knees in my not-so-tidy bedroom, I knew what he was doing was only symbolic of what we already knew and agreed, but it mellowed me to the core! It was really beautiful what he said and he actually managed to get me in tears (but barely 😝😝😝). When we started this journey, it was me, him and God and in that moment and the others ahead, that’s what mattered most to us.
So this is the story of how I said yes to the man of my dreams before I turned twenty-four. Who would have thought?!?